The wait is only starting. As the time is slowly passing by.
4 weeks until we see this little human. That kicks and punches and grows inside
me. Some days are better than others. A bad day is walking through Aldi doing
your normal weekly shop and suddenly your leg gives way with a screeching
pinched nerve forcing you to crouch in a position that could only look bad for
a heavily pregnant lady. You’re not in labour. But everyone who saw you most
definitely thinks you are. It goes away and you finish the shopping as quickly
as you can, purposefully not grabbing the things you wanted just to avoid other
inhabitants. A good day is not peeing your pants. Or having your two year old poo
her toilet training pants that leak onto white carpet just because you had to
have a shower or put the clothes on the line for 5 minutes. A good day is
really nonexistent in this household. I bet non-parents wonder why on earth we
go through so much pain, put our bodies in absolute indescribable agony, to
never completely recover from child birth and deal with the poo, vomit,
screams, tantrums, mess, anti-social life, smelly cars, stains, and 1001 more
reasons AND we are ridiculous to do it all again. Sometimes 2 or 5 or 10 times
over. Why are we so stupid and silly to get ourselves into a situation that was
terrible in the first place? It may sound cliché but it’s true, I just look at
my wonderful baby that me and my hubby created and actually can’t wait to have
another one just like her. 4 weeks. Okay, maybe I can wait. They change your
life completely. But once they are in your arms you never want to let them go. And
you should never let them separate from your heart. People go through some
unfortunate events and only those people would ever understand. If you are a
parent you must cherish your children as beautiful blessings because no matter
how mad you get at them, or how tough it is to scrub permanent marker out of
walls, or how frustrating it is when they cry if they want to ride a horse then
cry when they get on the horse, no matter how much they don’t listen to you
they are still a blessing. I’ve learnt to breathe through the pain and
frustration. Yeah, It’s not easy but teaching yourself to love their mistakes
and their bad moods brings even more happiness when they do something right.
When they lift their heads, start to crawl, begin to walk, when they say ‘Mumma’
& ‘Dadda’, when they can feed themselves, when they can kick a ball, when
they say “I Lubboo”, when they hug you for no apparent reason other than
because you love them back. It’s these moments that we need to remember why we
do it more than once. My experience has been a whirlwind journey and I have a
feeling it’s not going to slow down quite just yet. But I accept and am ready
as I ever will. My song of the day is With Arms Wide Open by Creed. It’s a
beautiful song accepting the life that has been created and acknowledging the responsibilities
that comes with parenthood.
Song of the day - With Arms Wide Open by Creed.
